Five Things I Would Do Differently If I Started Wedding Planning Today
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Wedding Wednesday
Let’s make things easier, shall we…
If you are in the midst of planning a wedding, chances are you are getting a lot of advice about what to do & what not to do. My husband & I were engaged in December of 2022, which gave me thirteen months of planning. Most people told me I had to do these three things right away: 1) book a venue 2) book a photographer 3) set a budget.
While these things do need to be done, doing them first actually created more stress than I needed. If I could do it all over again, here are the 5 things I would actually do first:
Watch Mindy Weiss Masterclass on Wedding Planning & Start Building Your Binder: If you don’t have a Masterclass subscription, this is the best $100 you could spend. Her course is easy to follow and put me at ease knowing there were only so many things that money could be spent on. Her approach to wedding planning is practical & focused on creating a great day for you and your guests. She gives you the names of free tools that actually help you keep track of payments, contact info of vendors & keep you on a timeline. She also helps you understand the variables of what you will spend and how to prioritize based on what you care most about. After watching her master class, I probably would have avoided many of the mistakes I made.
Define the Vision Before Booking Anything: Imagine seeing a wedding you love, booking the same planner and then finding out the actual cost of the wedding you want is 6x your budget. Now envision that, after you already committed to a wedding venue - sounds stressful? That’s because it is.
When I say define the vision, I mean go through on paper what you would like the day to be like - where is it? are you inside or outside? what does the decor look like? what time of year is it? how many people are there? I would do the exercise of saving photos or better yet organizing into a Google Slides or PPT that you can then share with a wedding planner.
Interview Planners based on your Vision: My planner is lovely & the sweetest human I think on earth. That said, when it came to communication styles - we probably couldn’t have been more different and this made communicating tougher than it needed to be. We would have realized that earlier if I had done a little more homework before we started - and that’s on me. When you interview planners you want to know - based on what I put in front of you what will this cost? Do you manage the budget? How do you help us manage costs with your vendor relationships? How often do we communicate? How do we communicate design decisions - excel or other means? Before you book, you also need to review the scope of work - what is included and how is it defined. Knowing this will save you money & time long term. If you are trying to save money, try a day of coordinator only or the month of planner. This requires you to be more involved and engaged, but can be a huge monetary difference.
Set a Range for Cost vs. Budget: I actually hate the word budget when it comes to wedding planning, because they seem pretty made up. A ton of people I know end up going obscenely over ‘budget’ and not only is that the part no one talks about, but it’s also just unrealistic numbers in the first place. You can set a budget all day long, but until you see what venues, photographers, flowers etc cost it’s challenging to determine what is a realistic budget. You do need to know the max you can spend, but you also need to see a more 360 view before making commitments.
First, understand the ballpark cost for your vision, and then decide if that is realistic. If what you can spend is not going to achieve your vision, how can you make changes to have it be more aligned to what you can spend?
Mindy says pick the 3 things that you really care about and invest in those. I agree - we spent a ton on a band & honestly they made the entire wedding. Go big on a statement and then cut other places that you care less about. Remember there are many details that you won’t find out about until the end - ie: day of stationary or a photo booth - and so don’t over invest too early.
Consider Travel Implications before booking a Venue: I loved my wedding. The whole weekend was incredible and it was designed to be a weekend of activities on an island so that my friends from all over could get a tropical vacation they didn’t know they needed without leaving the US. That said, what I hadn’t considered was how much of an expense travel can be not only for guests but also for the bride & groom. Things to think about include: travel fees for your vendors, hotel accommodations for your vendors, your own travel. The other thing you’ll want to think about is can my guests afford this. For us we were ok with travel meaning that guest count would be smaller, but for some this is a deal breaker.
These are things I would have liked to know going into our big day. Hopefully it helps you for yours!